- Worms are for watching- not for eating
- Keep your claws sheathed until times of threat. Then unsheathe and use them indiscriminately
- Birds want us to attack. Why else would they flutter their wings?
- Cultivate a plump human. They make the widest and softest of beds when winter comes and are more likely to have access to food, much of which will be suitable for a cat.
- Show affection for a lone human. Starved of affection they will reward your attention with treats.
- Purr when a human is in your presence. They like it and consequently may spoil you.
- Never smile when a human is in your presence. Instead cultivate an enigmatic expression.
- Catways are the fastest routes for a cat to use to get where it is going. Sofa backs make excellent springboards and should be included when planning your catway. Stomachs are also good.